Today, I just learned that my ex-husband’s younger brother had died. He had just turned 49 on July 7.

I remember Manny as very outspoken when the topic came around to one of his passions: old cars, computers and computer games, rock music, and any one of the many causes he advocated. I’ll have to admit that I don’t share any of his passions, although I do like old cars, and I agree with many of his views about political corruption and similar issues. Other issues I simply did not and could not agree with, but I kept those to myself to avoid any highly charged exchange of ideas.

The last time I saw him, I was in Cebu to give a workshop to a group of professionals and we actually just accidentally bumped into each other, because he had some business to attend to in the same building where I was delivering the workshop. He  looked pretty well, although he had a whole lot of white hair and he had definitely lost a lot of weight–something both good and bad, because he had diabetes. He told me about his job and how the wedding plans fell through but that he was staying because of his work and his new band and the bike he had recently bought.

Manny had a full life. He made the most of it for as long as he could and made it what he wanted it to be. And while I could write so much more of my encounters with him in the time I spent with his family, I will refrain from writing more at the risk of offending anyone.

Certainly, his mother loved him very much and she will miss him more than anyone else. I can only imagine what it is like to have your child die. But I do know how painfully devastating it is to lose a child. As I cannot be with her, I can only feel for her.

I hope he finds peace wherever he is.