The Official Coffee Shop Drive-Through Survival Guide (Or, How to order coffee in Canada) 3

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3rd installment

You should be an expert at placing single coffee orders at the drive through by now.

But you don’t always drive through to get just one coffee for yourself, do you? Quite often, you need to get a coffee for someone else, or several other people. Especially if you’re doing the coffee run for the office break. Then things start getting trickier and sometimes more frustrating for both you and people working in the drive through.

Let’s take it one more coffee at a time.

Let’s say you need two coffees. Simple enough. You drive up to the speaker box and you order two coffees. Right? Wrong.

“I’d like two coffees please.”

Silence. This means the order taker is waiting for you to elaborate. She has entered “2” in the number of items on the order screen and is still waiting. If you don’t say anything right away, you’ll get a question.

“What size would you like?”

“Umm, make them medium…”

Silence. This means the order taker is waiting for you to elaborate further. Meanwhile, she has selected “medium” and the order now reads “2 medium”.

“What would you like in your coffees?”

“Ummm..black…no, make one black and the other one cream and sugar.” She quickly selects “black” then re-enters “medium black” and “medium cream and sugar” and deletes the “2 medium black”.

“Okay. Would you like an apple cinnamon donut with that today?”

Silence. The order taker is waiting for you to answer. Her finger hovers over the donut menu, waiting for an answer. ANSWER!

“Mumble mumble”

“I’m sorry? Did you want the donut?”

“That’s fine.”

That’s fine? That’s fine? What kind of an answer is that? Is that supposed to mean “That’s fine, I’ll take the donut?” or “That’s fine, I don’t want anything else on my order? All that’s needed is a simple YES or NO. And please, PLEASE don’t just drive away, because someone out there inside that speaker box beyond what you see is waiting for an answer so he or she can tell you the price of your purchase.

Order takers are not mind readers. You need to let them know what you want. Coffee makers are not mind readers either. Let’s look at this same scenario from the coffee maker’s point of view.

“I’d like two coffees please.”

Coffee maker’s hand hovers over the medium and large cups.

“What size would you like?”

“Umm, make them medium…”

Coffee maker grabs two medium cups, setting them directly on the counter in front of her.

“What would you like in your coffees?”

“Ummm..black…no, make one black and the other one cream and sugar.”

As soon as you say “black” the coffee maker has one cup filled and is in the process of filling the next one, stops halfway when you change your mind and quickly scoops in a teaspoonful of sugar and squirts in a single medium serving of cream from the dispenser.. While the order taker is asking if you want a donut, the coffee maker has put lids on your coffees and is passing them to the window counter so that by the time your car gets to the window, you will have your two coffees. Meanwhile, at least two people (the coffee maker and the runner or supporting front counter crew or the shift manager) are poised waiting to hear if you want the donut or not. If not, they all go back to what they were doing, or wait for the next car to register its presence at the speaker box.

All these happen just so you can have your coffee the way you want it at the window of the drive through by the time you get there.

And that’s just for two medium coffees.

In sum, what you’ve learned today is how to order two different kinds of coffees. Remember the following tips and you’ll be okay at the drive through:

1. If ordering two or more coffees that are exactly the same, you may place a single order for all of them.

For example, “two medium black”, “four small cream and sugar”, “three large double double”, or “two extra large triple triple”.

2. If ordering two or more coffees that are different, order each one separately.

It’s somewhat confusing when you order “two large, one double double, one single single”, which will be easier to enter as an order if you simply say “one large double double and one large single single.” Also confusing is “large and medium double double and large and medium triple triple.” In all likelihood the order taker might only hear “medium double double and medium triple triple”.  Another order that messes up touch screen order entry is “two medium black, one with three sugar” which can be interpreted as two medium black coffees and one black with three sugar; it’s better to say “one medium black and one medium black with sugar”. The clearer your order, the more chances that you won’t get a botched order, and the more likely that you’ll be in and out of the drive through in a minute or less.

more to follow

How to Survive Coffee Shop Drive Throughs (2nd of a series)

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2nd installment

By now, you should be pretty proficient at ordering any size of black coffee or coffee with cream and sugar. What if you want more than a black coffee or just cream and sugar?

In Canada, we have special terms for getting more than one cream and sugar in your coffee. Let’s start with “double double”.

Any Canadian who’s worth his or her coffee knows what a “double double” is. To those of you who are new to Canada or not from Canada or haven’t been through the Canadian coffee experience, a double double is a coffee with two shots of creams and two spoons of sugar in it. For clarity, some drive through denizens say “double cream, double sugar”. Also acceptable are: “two-by-two”, and of course, the obvious “two cream and two sugar”.

A slight variation on the double double is the “double single” (two creams, one sugar) and the “single double” (one cream, two sugar).

In the spirit of following trends, a “triple triple” will get you a coffee with three creams and three sugars; saying “three-by-three” will get you the same effect, as will simply saying the obvious “three cream, three sugar” or “triple cream, triple sugar”.

Now, there are more permutations: “triple-single”, “triple-double”, “single-triple”, and “double-triple”. You just need to make sure you say these very clearly and be sure of what you’re saying, because you could easily confuse the order taker, the coffee assembler, and yourself.

As a warning, Canadians don’t like using very long words, so nobody orders a “quadruple-quadruple”. Don’t even try it if you don’t want to get laughed at or have the order taker say “what? could you repeat your order please” or some such embarrassing question. Simply ask for a “four-by-four” or a “four cream, four sugar”.

For other combinations, stick with what is clear and simple: five-by-five, five cream, two sugar; two cream, six sugar; triple cream, four sugar; and so on. I’m sure you get the idea.

more to come….

The Arrogance of Nations

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When a nation thinks itself above other nations, I consider that arrogance borne of ignorance. History has proven this time and again.

Western civilization thought itself the center of the world, ignorant of the existence of life anywhere else on earth. As a result, when nations of the west “discovered” the existence of Eastern cultures, they dubbed the new cultures as inferior to theirs–simply because they could not understand those cultures. Yet, they forget that the very seeds of Western civilization began in the East, often referred to as the birthplace of Western civilization. Long before Western civilization had any claim to being “civilized” Eastern cultures had developed sophisticated societies with social structures and technology that was alien to the Western world. It was from the East that Westerners acquired the wheel, gunpowder, silk, spices and perfumes, numbers, and the alphabet.

Despite the wealth of culture, technology and knowledge the Eastern world had, the West had no end to the derogatory terms they created to describe Easterners. Little did they know that Eastern cultures had their own derogatory terms for Westerners, as well.

The wars between nations were the weapons of arrogance–one nation believing itself superior to its neighbour and attacking it, or overpowering its neighbour to become superior over another neighbour.

In the dark ages, Medieval Europe, in its arrogance, marched upon the Muslim countries in the East to purge the land of infidels. Little did they know that they were seen as infidels as well, by the Muslims.

In the Middle Ages and throughout the Renaissance, the powers of England, France and Spain constantly battled through bloody war, treachery and treason to gain supremacy over Europe.

In the 16th through the 18th centuries, the powers of the Western world expanded their horizons in a race to conquer the rest of the unknown world–but only from their narrow perspective. It was a race to conquer and acquire more lands to prove and maintain their supremacy until there were no more new lands to be found and conquered.

In the 20th century, the Germans attempted to gain world supremacy through the ruthless and unconscionable leadership of a man who thought he was a God and his race superior to all.

Throughout the 20th century, the fight for supremacy continued–among Middle Eastern nations, among Eastern European nations, among Asian nations, Among African nations.

This arrogance of nations is imprinted upon its people–or is it the arrogance of people that shapes the arrogance of nations? Nations are, after all, run by people, made up of people. A nation’s policy and practice is determined by its leaders, supposedly following the will of the people–or acting in the best interest of its people. Does this mean then, that all men are arrogant? Or are nations run only according to the wishes of the powerful and wealthy who control the nations? Surely, the man on the street does not wish to go to war or acquire another country when his main concern is to feed, clothe and educate his children?

Probably the last time every member of any nation had a vote on whether or not to go to war was when nations nations were small tribes concerned about protecting their own or wanting land where they could find better food. Once nations grew in size, the common man lost his voice and only the powerful and outspoken were heard–who may well have been the greedy and arrogant, as well.

Greed breeds a strong desire for wealth and power, and if this is the basic nature of any nation’s leaders, then we are indeed in poor hands. The greedy tend to be blind to those who have little or nothing to offer. They step on others to get their way and ignore what they don’t understand. Anything that seems like a threat or tries to get in their way, they destroy. The more wealth and power they acquire, the more arrogant they become. And the more arrogant and righteous they are, the more the world is doomed to repeat the cycle of history–of discovery, of conquest, of dominance, of destruction. The more we are doomed to suffer from the arrogance to nations.

The Official Coffee Shop Drive-Through Survival Guide (Or, How to order coffee in Canada)

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1st of several installments

So, you want a coffee and you want to get it in a drive-through because you’re in hurry. Here are some facts and tips that will help you get through that drive-through within 60 seconds or less, from the time you place your order to the time you drive away with your coffee.

If you want to make sure you get what you want in the coffee you order when in Canada, say exactly what you want to be on the safe side. But if you want to sound like you know your way around Canada and its coffee shops, then you will have to learn the right lingo.

Coffee in the average Canadian coffee shop (think Tim Hortons) is always brewed, so it’s pointless to ask for brewed coffee.

Coffee is black. If you want it black, say “black”. If you don’t want anything else in it, just say “black”. If you don’t want cream or sugar, just say “black”. Don’t say “regular”, because that means “cream and sugar”. Don’t say “no sugar” if you don’t want sugar. Just say what you want, never what you don’t want. Anything you say might sound like you’re ordering it, especially since the antiquated speakers and headsets are not always the clearest and best way to communicate. Many drive-through orders become confusing because of people saying what they don’t want, rather than what they want:

“black no sugar” can actually sound like “black one sugar” on a staticky headset; “cream, no sugar” might sound just like “cream n’sugar” or “cream one sugar”

I can’t stress it enough: help yourself and help the order taker and the coffee assembler by saying ONLY WHAT YOU WANT. IF YOU DON’T WANT SUGAR, DON’T EVEN MENTION IT!!!

Coffee comes in four sizes: small, medium, large, and extra large. For best results, mention the size you want before anything else. That’s because whoever makes your coffee grabs the cup before making the coffee. It saves a couple of seconds so that by the time you’re done ordering, your coffee will be ready at the window.

“I’d like a small black, please.”

“May I have a medium black?”

“One large black, please.”

“Extra large black, please.”

The moment your coffee assembler (the person who makes your coffee) hears the size, he or she grabs the cup of the right size then quickly pours black coffee, if your order is black. If you don’t say the size first, for instance, you say “black coffee please”, you lose precious seconds while the order taker asks you what size and the assembler waits, hand hovering above the cups, trying to predict what size you want.

It’s okay not to say you’re ordering coffee, because it’s a coffee shop anyway and the main product is brewed coffee. If you’re ordering something else, like tea or hot cappuccinos or cold drinks, then you need to mention what the drink is.

If you want more than one coffee, you should also say so at the start of your order. That way, the coffee maker can set up the correct number and sizes of cups and prepare your coffee as you are ordering it and fill several cups in a matter of seconds. It is quite annoying for the assembler to start making an order that he or she thinks is a single coffee and finish that, only to find out that there are two or three more drinks following.

Some of the most frustrating orders taken:

“Black coffee, please” (assembler’s hand hovers over cups)

“What size would you like your coffee?”

“Oh, medium…(assembler grabs medium cup and immediately starts pouring)…no, make that a large…” (assembler grabs a large cup,  fills that and covers the cup with a lid)…

“Would you like a Boston Creme with that?”

“No. By the way, can you make that two large?”

“Of course. How would you like your second coffee?”

“Just black….(assembler is pouring)….no, make that a single-single…(assembler stops pouring, adds one cream and one sugar, then finishes pouring, stirring coffee as it is poured)…and make it with milk, please. (assembler shakes head, throws hands up in air, then starts all over again with a new cup)…

If you want something in your coffee, you normally ask for cream or sugar, or both. The “regular” order, naturally, is cream and sugar in your coffee. To order, say “I’d like a medium regular, please” or “May I have a small cream and sugar?” You will also be understood if you say “One large single-single, please.” To say “One extra large coffee with one cream and one sugar, please” is also acceptable, but wastes time. Less words said, less time wasted. Also, less chances for your order to be made wrong. Remember, everything else you say might confuse the order taker.

(more to follow)

Why I Am NOT Optimistic

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In the article “Why I’m Optimistic” by Barack Obama (Smithsonian Magazine, July/August 2010, vol. 41 no. 4, p. 59) Obama writes about his faith in America and American people’s restless inventiveness as what will help the American nation rise to the challenge of the future.

He wrote of the need for a commitment to “prepare [American] kids to outcompete workers around the world [and] to prepare America to outcompete nations around the world.”

While we generally see competition as helathy, we have learned time and again, throughout history, that in competition, there will be a winner and, consequently, a loser.

Obama suggests that America emerge as the winner in the “Race to the Top” in all aspects of society–from education to energy research to the global economy. He is implying a win-lose situation where America will reign as the “winner” and the rest of the world will trail behind as “losers”.

This seems to me a very one-sided and archaic way of looking at things.

Whatever happened to the concept of WIN-WIN? Can’t everyone win in this situation? Must there be winners and losers?

In a generation of globalism and multiculturalism, I think it is time that America realizes that this is not a race with only one winner, because if the majority turn out to be losers, then the whole world loses–the earth loses–humankind loses.

It is time for America to realize that the knowledge, skills and talent needed to save the world do not like exclusively in America. It is time for America to realize that cooperation and collaboration on a global scale is the only way we can face the future and survive as humans. Imagine, if every nation in the world shared their resources–whether in the form of money, natural resources, skills, intellectual resources, technology and labour–all for a common goal, how much easier and quicker that goal would be achieved.

I think it is time we all rise above national egos and consider that saving the earth and working toward a future that is not the picture painted by post-apocalyptic cinema requires us to forget territorial barriers and feudalistic attitudes. We need to make use of our unique traits and our differences to complement rather than compete with each other. We must realize that we cannot save the world by saving only one continent our country, but by saving every continent, every nation, every island. We need to accept that the world is not made up of only humans, but of an intricate global ecosystem in which we are interdependent on each other and on our environments. We must accept that, in this race to the future, we can leave no one behind. We must admit that, for any one country to win, we must all win, or all lose in the end.

And yet another can…

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Purple Can

This is my latest can creation in purple. It is now officially Nettie’s.

Rebecca’s 8th birthday cake

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This is the cake I baked and decorated for Rebecca’s 8th birthday.

She mentioned that she wished she had a birthday cake that was chocolate with white icing and “Pokemon Girl” on it. I told her that maybe her fairy godmother would bring it on her birthday, and the sweet darling asked me is I was her fairy godmother!

This moist chocolate was 3 layers with mini marshmallow and chocolate frosting between layers.

Still more cans

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I do enjoy prettying up the cans. Besides allowing me to be creative, it’s very relaxing–therapeutic, really.

"Turquoise"

“Turquoise”

This one (“Turquoise”) is now with Tina Inness.

"Turkish Delight"

“Turkish Delight”

I made “Turkish Delight” for Janine.

"Fisherman's Dream"

“Fisherman’s Dream”

I created “Fisherman’s Dream” for Vera.

"Pink Surprise"

“Pink Surprise”

“Pink Surprise” was a surprise for Rebecca, Vera’s daughter. Rebecca is a little darling and I just love her!

"Midnight"

“Midnight”

I call this one “Midnight”.

"Summer"

“Summer”

“Summer” is my cookie tin for homemade cookies and other occasional goodies.

"English Toffee"

“English Toffee”

"English Toffee"-angle 2

“English Toffee”-angle 2

"English Toffee" - angle 3

“English Toffee” – angle 3

I was looking for another can to pretty up and just emptied a can of—you guessed it, Nicky—English Toffee powder mix from Tim Horton’s! I thought it would be a pretty paintbrush bucket or some such handy container.

 

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Yellow and Green Cans

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More cans I made for a couple more friends.

The green one is “Nicky” and the yellow one is “Courtney”.

Someone said I should keep them for myself because they’re just too pretty to give away and I spend so much time and effort on them.

I get really great pleasure from creating them, but  the greatest pleasure I get from making them is making them for friends to brighten up their day and know that they’re appreciated!

yellow can1 - "Courtney"

“Courtney”

green can "Nicky"

“Nicky”

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Red Can

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red can 3

"Anita"

I decorated this can for a friend. I used beads, macaroni, buttons, and string.

I gave away another one, in purple, and forgot to take a picture before I gave it away.

Pictures are a nice way of keeping a record of things you’ve done, but too many times, the things we do aren’t recorded in any way.

Sometimes, that’s a terrible shame.